Over on Facebook, I posted this list of 100 random facts about myself. I wanted to archive it here.
No one tagged me. I’m worthless. As punishment to me — or perhaps you, dear reader — I will offer 4x the number of random facts required by Facebook’s recent meme.
1. Though I placed 2nd, 3rd, and 1st in three consecutive spelling bees, I cannot spell “terrific” without a spell-checker. (I got it wrong at first writing this very entry.)
2. I didn’t eat any vegetables (or non-apple/banana fruits) consistently until I was 25-years-old. I’m still learning to eat many of them.
3. I interviewed “Weird Al” Yankovic for a youth-focused local newspaper when I was 15. I met Al again, in a different state, backstage at a concert, when I was 18. He looked at me and said: “Lex Friedman, Hershey, Pennsylvania!” I remain impressed.
4. My favorite songs of all time include “Doctor Worm” by They Might Be Giants, “She’s An Angel” by same, and very recent addition “You Don’t Know Me At All” by Ben Folds.
5. I attended sleepaway summer camp for nine of the most formative summers of my life.
6. I absolutely hate shaving, and think I deserve much recognition and accolades for doing so nearly every other day.
7. I hate cats, mostly because I’m allergic to them.
8. I am always, always, always nice to customer service reps on the phone (and in person).
9. I can do an uncanny impression of a horse galloping using only my tongue.
10. I turned down a marriage proposal.
11. In high school, I created a written list of goals for myself that included getting engaged/married by a certain time, laser-correcting my vision, and more. I completed every goal on the list with a single exception: I am not yet a cast member on Saturday Night Live.
12. I can keep a secret.
13. The top joint of the middle finger of my right hand cracks frequently when bent. I hate it.
14. I try to close my laptop by 9pm each night, after a workday of full-time computing. I don’t always succeed, but am happier when I do.
15. If I like a band or TV show, I make it my business to own every album/watch every episode. I am a completist.
16. Of all the modern gadgets I own, the one that I think has benefitted my life the most, and brought me the most added happiness, is my TiVo.
17. I am dreading thinking up 83 more facts.
18. I am lousy at doing even relatively simple math in my head. I wish I were better at remembering numbers.
19. One of my biggest professional regrets is that my weekly comedy video show on Cracked got cancelled. I wish I’d been funnier, or more popular, or both.
20. I juggle very, very poorly.
21. I balance objects on my face fairly well.
22. I bat and do magic tricks left-handed. I do everything else with my right.
23. I still get a thrill checking the mailbox, seeing if something cool arrived.
24. I work very, very hard at my job, and always have, at each job I’ve ever had.
25. If I hadn’t promised 100 random facts, I’d be done now.
26. I hate so-called grammarians who hyper/over-correct “errors” that aren’t (like wrongly thinking that I needed to use “finished” instead of “done” above).
27. I learned 99% of the grammar I know now from Mr. Meiser in sixth grade.
28. I see mistakes (i.e., continuity errors) in movies and television constantly, and without actively looking for them.
29. Every girl I’ve ever kissed, save one (my wife), is on Facebook. Of those who are on Facebook, all but two are my Facebook friends.
30. I work remotely from my home in Jersey for a company in Santa Monica, California. I wish the entire office were, like me, Mac-based — or at least better web-cammed — so that we could more easily video chat on an ongoing basis.
31. I knew I’d love my daughters, but I wasn’t prepared for just how much.
32. I expect that “The West Wing” DVD box set (which I own), and the “Lost” DVD box set (which doesn’t yet exist) will be the last two DVD box sets I ever acquire. (Because I believe I’ll get all of my future media through various streaming online sources, legally.)
33. My brain is constantly forming jokes, about everything. Even in completely inappropriate contexts, my brain is constantly generating funny lines of varying qualities.
34. I am 100% convinced I would make an excellent addition to the cast of the American version of The Office.
35. I’ve worn braces three times in my life: Once to correct only a massive gap between my top two teeth, once to straighten all my teeth, and once (as Invisalign) to fix my bottom teeth after my wisdom teeth came in and mucked them all up.
36. I don’t like the site of blood. Mine, yours, or anyone’s.
37. TV/movie blood rarely makes me squeamish, if I know it’s fake.
38. Passive aggression drives me crazy.
39. I wear a size 12 shoe.
40. But I prefer to be barefoot (or be-socked) whenever possible.
41. My hair was straight until my mid-teens, when it suddenly and inexplicably curled.
42. I have an awful sense of direction.
43. I consider myself excellent at writing short stories, but I haven’t written any since college.
44. My wife is really my best friend. I would love to have a male best friend, and am close, but right now most of my local male peers (and I!) are a little too swamped with family and life obligations to evolve into true bestiness.
45. Many of my life philosophies mirror those of Penn & Teller.
46. I’ll read any book that Dave Barry writes. Same goes for Al Franken and Ben Sherwood.
47. After every movie I watch, I check its Wikipedia page and its IMDb page to learn more about it.
48. I know the fifty states in alphabetical order, the alphabet backwards, the complete lyrics to “One Week” by the Barenaked Ladies, and many more things that weren’t worth memorizing — I just couldn’t help myself.
49. I prefer keyboard shortcuts to mouse utilization.
50. My freshman college roommate was unbelievably awful, comically so. I was offered a move to a single halfway through the year, and jumped at the chance.
51. I don’t think Angelina Jolie is hot. Or Julia Roberts. Or Pamela Anderson.
52. I take oral hygiene very seriously. I floss and use mouthwash every day. (And brush, too.)
53. If my wife didn’t hate facial hair, I’d grow mine out.
54. I wish I played the piano better and the guitar at all.
55. I find swear words hilarious. They’re just sounds that we assign meaning to, and it amuses me that so many find them so offensive.
56. I regret not having gone abroad to Australia during college. Instead of going abroad separately, Lauren and I stayed at Brandeis together to pursue our relationship. Overall, I’d say we made the right choice!
57. I love honey mustard.
58. I want an iPhone, but it makes no sense with my insanely good TMobile contract, and my working from home. So I stick to my iPod touch.
59. Working from home, I can sometimes go six days straight without leaving the house (other than to fetch the mail or take the garbage out). That’s bad.
60. If I had the option to stop working and pursue other not-necessarily-profitableinterests, I’d take it in an instant.
61. I don’t listen to the radio.
62. I love performing improv comedy. Watching it, though, often makes me tense.
63. I wish I could draw.
64. I can wiggle one ear at a time.
65. I can tongue click very, very loudly. Probably louder than you.
66. My RSS reader has 295 feeds. I generally spend a combined 60 minutes/day scanning/reading those feeds.
67. I hate cubicles.
68. I love semicolons.
69. My fingernails grow very quickly. I cut them at least twice per week.
70. I am more than a foot taller than my wife.
71. I’m one of those people who does “the dance of not using my hands” in public restrooms. Flush with my foot, turn faucets with my elbow, etc.
72. I ate salmon skin (while eating salmon, not on its own) until I met Lauren. It grosses her out, and her repulsion grossed me out, too.
73. I only drink Dr. Pepper warm. I prefer diet sodas, but fear they’re going to give me cancer.
74. I can taste the difference between tap, Brita, and spring water.
75. My first impressions of people are accurate about 99% of the time.
76. I sometimes fear that I’m not good enough at letting people I admire/respect know that I feel that way.
77. The number for Pizza Hut growing up was 777-7777. I was stunned to learn that other Pizza Huts elsewhere in the country had different phone numbers.
78. I don’t know what the hell it means to bring sexy back. I’m not sure I want to.
79. Okay, I am sure: I don’t want to know.
80. My least favorite quality is condescension.
81. My favorite is sense of humor.
82. I use different passwords for everything. I don’t use a password manager, and I’m always stunned that I remember them all.
83. If a fake URL is mentioned during a TV show, I’ll go there right away.
84. I am certain that Neil Patrick Harris and I would be good friends, if he knew me.
85. I still get excited on my birthday.
86. The vast majority of my non-food shopping is done online.
87. Thanks to TiVo, I almost never watch commercials. Sorry, advertisers!
88. I think Davids Copperfield and Blaine are punks.
89. I drink tea most days, a habit that started in mid to late 2008.
90. I was initially resistant to some technologies — MP3s, Facebook, TiVo, Netflix — that are now major factors in my life.
91. My first non-AOL-based Internet connection was advertised as “text-only.” It was a dial-in Unix-shell. I owe much of my Unix and Internet know-how to that connection.
92. I wish I could survive on less sleep. I strongly considered switching to polyphasic sleep (napping for 20 minutes every few hours), but it’s a little too impractical for real-world living.
93. Careers I’d pursue if money were no object: Stand-up comedy, photography, TV writer, voice-over artist.
94. I don’t like superstition.
95. I’m a big fan of chocolate milk.
96. I would love to grow my hair out like Sayid’s (on Lost), but I just don’t think my hair is capable of his greatness.
97. I’m not a fan of several popular movie series: Star Wars, The Matrix, Lord of the Rings, and Harry Potter spring immediately to mind.
98. I thought writing 100 facts about myself would take less time.
99. My full name is Alexander, but almost no one calls me that. When people ask if “Lex” is short for anything, I like to respond “Leeeeeeeeeeeeeeex.”
100. In elementary school, someone devised the nickname “Sexy Lexy,” which at the time was a Very Bad Thing. It was a major moniker of shame. In senior high school, no one would call me that, no matter how much I wanted them to.